By this time tomorrow, Malachi and I will be back in California for a therapy trip to the Anat Baniel Method Center. I truly didn't think we would ever do that again after last time, but through generous support from the Sparrow Club at David Douglas High School, we were able to take the chance.
I am more convinced than ever of the efficacy of the Anat Baniel Method and hope that I can make the improvements in Malachi stick a little better this time. It also seems like the universe is arranging itself to send me on this trip. It sounds crazy to me to write that, since none of this would even be necessary if the Powers That Be had prevented Malachi's brain injury in the first place, but it seems as though providence has been providing for us lately and urging us to take this trip. We only decided to do it two weeks ago, and already we were able to get appointments; out of the blue someone offered a free roundtrip airline ticket down there; and I even found the perfect carry-on bag in our garage today that my husband said a stranger simply gave him one day. Oh and get this, the cheap car service I had to order to get us to where we are staying wasn't available but the guy arranged a limo service to pick us up for practically the same price. (It'll be like when Sex and The City went to California, only I'll look like a pack animal with a baby strapped to my chest and all of our luggage trailing behind me.)
Lots of weird little details like that that seem to just be coming together. Makes me hopeful.
It will just be the two of us, Malachi and me. I'm excited (only one baby?) and nervous (only one parent?). I'll also miss Jaden and Matt. I bet I'll be shocked at how much Jaden will have grown.
So, in the interest of science (SCIENCE!), I took this "before" video of Malachi on the floor. As much as I talk about Malachi's disability, I think regular readers may have noticed how I almost always post pictures and videos showing him as normal as possible. But he's definitely not. And taking this video left me falling again. I try so hard to look at how far he has come, how bright and cute he is — all the positives and all the hope for the future. But sometimes it hits me so hard. My baby is almost two years old. He can't walk. He can't sit. Dammit, he can't really even roll over.
I really thought he would be doing more by now.
Hopefully soon I can say that he does.
Malachi at 21 months from Shasta Kearns Moore on Vimeo.
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